


let it snow

by ndnickerson



Category: Nancy Drew - Carolyn Keene
Genre: Engaged Couple, F/M, Fireplaces, Foreplay, Nancy Drew Yuletide, Post-Canon, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Sharing Body Heat, Sharing a Bed, Snowed In, Yuletide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-27
Updated: 2013-12-27
Packaged: 2018-01-06 08:59:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1104939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ndnickerson/pseuds/ndnickerson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for Nancy Drew Yuletide 2013. Prompt: While dating (or engaged possibly, just before they've had sex) Nancy and Ned become stranded in the snow somewhere. Cue sexual tension. Or any scene where there's some sexual tension, really. The tension can be resolved or remain unresolved.</p>
            </blockquote>





	let it snow

_Tap. Tap-tap. Tap._

Nancy became aware of the sound before anything else. Like very small coins falling against glass, or...

Or like ice against the roof.

She opened her eyes and, for a few seconds, before the headache began to develop, she wasn't sure where she was. Then it came back to her.

One of Ned's Omega Chi brothers, Ron Lincoln, had invited them to a New Year's Eve party at Fox River. Ron had his parents' vacation house for the party, kegs and wine and liquor, a massive sound system, and no adult supervision. When Ned had asked if she wanted to go, Nancy had agreed; she didn't want to stay all night, but the Nickerson cabin at Fox Lake was relatively nearby. If something kept them from being able to make the drive home, at least she knew they would have somewhere safe to spend the night that wouldn't involve an uncomfortable couch-bed or the back of Ned's car.

When she lifted her head, she realized that she was at Ned's parents' cabin—but not in one of the bedrooms. When she moved, the blanket over her shifted, and she hissed when the cold air touched her skin. She had paired her royal-blue satin sleeveless party dress with tights, boots, and a leather jacket, but she wasn't wearing her leather jacket right now, and her arms were totally uncovered.

Ned mumbled something next to her, and Nancy looked down at her sleeping fiancé; just moving her head made a wave of nausea crash over her, and she groaned. She and Ned were on the couch together; apparently they had been too drunk to make it to the stairs and the bedrooms.

Very, _very_ dimly she remembered stumbling into something, a cold loud car ride with a lot of singing. Telling Ned that she loved him _a lot._

And shots. Oh, so many shots. So many fucking shots.

Nancy made a soft distressed sound as she began to push herself to her feet. She wasn't wearing her boots, and her tights were slippery against the hardwood, and she fell back onto the couch in an untidy heap. That made her stomach flip again, and she began to breathe shallowly through her mouth, hoping she could stave off the nausea until she reached the downstairs bathroom.

She barely made it in time, and as she slumped over the toilet, a wave of that temporary euphoria sweeping over her, she shivered in her cold sweat. God, the cabin was freezing; the linoleum was like ice against her knees, even through the thickness of her tights, and she couldn't decide if she was hot or cold.

When she heard Ned moving through the living room, she grasped the edge of the countertop and pulled herself to her feet, flushing the toilet. Ned opened the door, then reeled in surprise on seeing her. He looked just as out of it as she felt.

"It's okay," she rasped, then cleared her throat. She made a face. God, her mouth tasted sour. "I'm done."

Ned nodded, and Nancy headed to the kitchen, closing her eyes in sympathy as she heard Ned empty his own stomach. God. What a way to ring in the new year.

She rinsed out her mouth, then splashed water on her face. From the quick glimpse she had caught of her own reflection in the bathroom mirror, her mascara was smeared, her makeup gleaming. She pulled a paper towel off the roll and began to wipe her ruined makeup off.

Ned coughed as he came out of the bathroom. "God," he mumbled, running his hand through his hair. "Morning."

Nancy chuckled. "Morning."

Together she and Ned went to the back door of the cabin, gazing out together; she released a soft dismayed groan. The weather report had said that a cold front was expected to bring some precipitation later on New Year's Day, but it hadn't been expected so early.

The tapping she had heard had indeed been ice. The back porch was a solid sheet of it. From what she could tell, snow, sleet, and ice had alternated for most of the night. The landscape glittered; the sky was white and glaring. It was still coming down.

The roads around the Fox Lake cabins were already twisting and hard to navigate in bad weather. In conditions like this, they would be impassable.

Ned touched Nancy's hand. "Happy New Year."

She chuckled. Despite her hangover and the circumstances, his touch still sent a pleasant shiver down her spine, and she squeezed his hand gently. "Happy New Year."

Then she went to the refrigerator. The Nickersons kept it stocked with bottled water year-round, and she pulled out one for herself and one for Ned. Ned was patting his pockets, his brow furrowed.

"Any idea where the hell my keys would be?"

Nancy shook her head, then immediately regretted the movement. "I don't _think_ you drove last night."

Ned snorted. "I hope to hell I didn't. God. Haven't been that drunk in a while."

"Halloween," Nancy volunteered, and Ned cast a mock-sardonic glance at her.

Ned found his jacket and checked the pockets; Nancy went to the cabin's other door and opened it. "Uh, here, honey," she called. His keyring was still hanging from the cabin's entrance key, which was stuck in the doorknob lock.

Ned made an incredulous sound. "Good thing there isn't a lot of crime out here. God, I'm glad no one tried to break in last night."

"Me too. We were in no shape to fight them off," Nancy said, then took the cap off her water bottle.

Ned went out to check on the electricity for the cabin, and Nancy went to the kitchen to check their supplies. God, her head was pounding. She was going to need her purse. Which...

"Shit," Nancy muttered. She hoped she hadn't been drunk enough to leave it at the party; she had no idea where it would be now if she had left it there. She found her jacket and boots near the blankets she and Ned had slept under, but not her purse or cell phone. She grabbed the afghan and pulled it around her, shivering against the cold.

Extra-strength painkiller, she decided. That was what she needed first. Then a change of clothes, _warmer_ clothes. A shower in a few hours, when she could keep her balance for more than a few seconds at a time. Then, maybe, in a year or so, something to eat.

Ned came back into the cabin a minute later, stamping his feet against the doormat, shivering. His jaw was lined in stubble, and ice gleamed in his hair; she was speechless for a second just looking at him. "Holy _fuck_ , it's cold," he announced. "Shit. Did the power not come on?"

Nancy glanced at the microwave; its display was blank. The refrigerator's motor hadn't kicked in. "Um," she murmured. "I don't think so."

Ned groaned. "The ice probably took down a power line."

"Probably," Nancy sighed. "Your car isn't here, by chance?"

"Yeah, it is."

Nancy raised her eyebrows. "Really?"

"I have this really vague memory of someone else trying to drive here and me giving directions," Ned said. "And laughing a lot. So I'm pretty sure someone else drove us here. You're not talking about trying to leave right now—?"

Nancy started to shake her head, then swallowed hard. She had to stop doing that. "Uh, no. Just... we had overnight bags in the trunk? And my purse. I don't have my purse."

Ned gave her a small smile. "Be right back."

As she waited for him to come back, Nancy went to the kitchen and opened the pantry. Good for Edith. Since she didn't know when Ned and Nancy, or she and James, might want to use the cabin, Edith even left it stocked over the winter. She found several cans of soup, sealed packets of crackers and cookies, food that she and Ned could prepare with a camp stove or over the fire if they needed to. She couldn't help chuckling when she even found ingredients to make peanut butter s'mores.

Ned returned with his teeth chattering, and Nancy gave a delighted cry when she saw her purse in his arms along with their bags. "It was in the backseat," he told her, shouldering the door shut behind him. "Sorry it took so long. The doors and trunk were frozen shut and I had to chip away the ice to get them open. God." He groaned as he put it all down, then collapsed to the couch. "Mind if I sit down for a minute? I'm still feeling pretty shitty."

Nancy found the pain reliever in her purse, then shook out four of them, two for him and two for her. Ned gulped them down with some water, then tipped his head back with a sigh. Nancy sat down for a rest break too; she was shivering, and very aware that when she stripped her tights off to put on her jeans, she was going to be freezing.

And Ned was so warm. When she had opened her eyes that morning, she had been leaning against him, cuddled up to him under the blankets.

Without opening her eyes, and not for the first time that morning, Nancy touched her engagement ring with her left thumb, then relaxed slightly. She hadn't misplaced or lost it yet, but she still worried about it.

Ned had proposed to her during the last weekend of the summer, asking her to marry him once he had finished his senior year at Emerson, and she had happily agreed. Since then, they had been planning their wedding for May. The decisions had been endless; she wasn't just selecting a dress, but dresses for bridesmaids, for a flower girl if she wished, colors and flowers for bouquets, invitations, the reception menu, her veil and shoes, her hairstyle. Much of it had already been settled, and Nancy would be glad once it was finished.

She smiled slightly to herself. It wasn't that she was dreading being married to Ned; it was that the prospect of their wedding was a little overwhelming. It would be the start of their life together. She wanted it to be good—perfect, if possible.

Afterward, well... afterward seemed like a dream. She and Ned, and Edith and Bess and Hannah, were all so focused on the wedding that the time after felt like it would most likely take care of itself.

With a sigh Nancy relaxed against Ned, pulling the afghan up so it covered them to the chin. She didn't want to move any more than she absolutely needed to.

But the room was freezing. She knew the Nickersons kept firewood in a stack at the back of the cabin.

And she would go get some of it. In a minute.

_Just need to rest my eyes for a minute..._

That was how they had ended up asleep together on the couch in the first place, she remembered then.

She didn't know how long they drowsed, just that she was stiff and cold when she woke again. Ned's cell phone was ringing.

"Shit. _Shit_ ," he muttered, digging for it. He searched frantically through his coat pockets, and managed to answer it just before it was going to switch to voicemail. "Hello?"

Nancy checked her watch and was surprised that Edith had waited so long to call and check on them. Ned reassured her that they were okay, as Nancy downed half her water. She was leaning forward, her eyes closed again, when Ned hung up the phone.

"She says the roads are totally awful back home too, but she's glad we're okay. They don't expect it to let up until this afternoon, but the temperature is still going to be below freezing, and whatever melts will just refreeze overnight—"

"In time for the next round of it tomorrow?" Nancy guessed.

Ned nodded. "Yeah. So we might be here a couple days. Good thing we have that solar panel hooked up to the water heater."

Nancy had forgotten about that; she relaxed a little. At least she wouldn't have to take an ice-cold shower. "And an outlet, right?"

"Yeah. One outlet."

"My phone's totally dead. Okay if I plug it in?"

Nancy found her backup charger in her overnight bag and plugged her phone in, and while Ned was bringing in firewood, she went to the bathroom, gave herself a quick sponge bath, and changed clothes. The cold was bitter enough to burn her exposed flesh, and she hissed when her bare foot came into contact with the cold floor. Trying to keep her balance was hard, and a few times she thought she might need to throw up again, but she managed to regain her equilibrium.

She felt marginally better when she walked out of the bathroom in thick socks and sneakers, comfortable jeans, and a t-shirt with a hooded zippered Emerson sweatshirt over it and a sweater over that. Ned had brought in generous armfuls of firewood, and in the process he had let in even more cold air; Nancy slipped her red, trembling hands into her pockets, shuddering as she went for her coat and zipped that on, too.

"Can I help?"

"I think the matches are in the kitchen, in the drawer next to the sink."

The entire cabin was filled with dishwater-grey light from the overcast sky outside, all in cold shadow; Nancy dug through the kitchen's junk drawer until she found the long matches, almost indistinguishable from everything else. She found an old brown-paper grocery bag in the dim shadow under the sink too, and tore it into strips to help serve as a fire starter.

Together Nancy and Ned built the foundation for the fire, then sat back and watched it catch. Underneath the brief perpetual taps of the ice against the roof, the cabin was almost eerily quiet. The initial flame was a tiny wink of gold and red, burning hot yellow and white as it curled along the edge of the paper strip. They both released a soft sigh when the edge of the log caught flame, and the washed-out grey was pushed back by the flickering light in the hearth.

Nancy brought her hands up to her mouth and blew on them; Ned reached for her hands. "Here," he murmured, kissing her fingers before he brought her hands down and hooked them under the hem of his shirt. He flinched when her cold palms came into contact with his warm skin, but Nancy closed her eyes and slumped against him with a sigh.

"Mmm," she murmured. "Oh, Ned, I'm sorry but that feels so good."

"It's all right." He kissed the crown of her head. "Let's just try to warm up, huh?"

She pressed her face against the side of his neck and they held each other silently for a long moment. Then she smiled.

"Hmm?" Ned murmured.

"I would ask if you want to put your hands under my shirt too, but we know where that would lead."

"To you shivering?" Ned teased her softly. "No, it's all right. I found my big heavy gloves, so I'm okay." He paused. "Feeling any better?"

"Mmm. A little," she murmured. "I think I'll take a shower after lunch; I can almost feel the alcohol in my pores still."

"Sounds like a good idea."

"Lunch, or the shower?"

"My stomach still isn't settled, but both, honestly. I need to change clothes. Ugh."

"Mmm. This from the guy who spent an entire weekend in the same pair of sweatpants."

"Yeah, but some drunk party girl hadn't dumped a piña colada all over me while I was wearing them."

"Oh yeah. I forgot about that."

"I haven't. I still smell like coconut and pineapple. And rum and sweat." He grimaced.

Nancy kept her bare hands against his skin a few seconds longer, then reluctantly pulled back. "All right. Here, have some more water, and then we can figure out what we're doing for lunch."

Neither of them felt much like eating until early that afternoon, and by then Nancy's headache had begun to ease a little. Thanks to the large fire in the fireplace, which they were regularly feeding, the living room was the warmest room in the house. They heated up cans of soup over the fire and ate them slowly once the food had cooled off, then sat back. Her face was warmed by the fire, and she held out her hands, feeling it radiate against her palms.

"It's not so bad," Ned commented.

"What?"

He gestured to the room at large. "This. I wish we had power, but we have food and shelter and a quick hot shower. It's nice and cozy. Almost—domestic."

Nancy smiled. "Yeah, it is. We could definitely be much worse off."

Ned tipped back the rest of his water bottle, then sighed. "All right. I'm gonna take a shower and get changed."

Nancy nodded, reaching for his empty bowl so she could take it to the kitchen. "I think I'll try to find the lantern, I seem to remember there was one here, or at least some candles. And some board games."

Ned nodded. "Or, we could conserve water," he said, his voice quieter. "If you wanted to join me."

Nancy blushed a little as she glanced at him. "No, that's okay," she murmured. "Thanks—for the offer, though."

Ned smiled back at her; no hard feelings. "All right."

Once Ned was in the bathroom, Nancy released a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. She didn't feel upset, or nervous, not really—but she did, a little.

She had been engaged to Ned for four months now, and she was still a virgin.

Granted, they hadn't been entirely innocent. During her trips to Emerson over the fall semester, she had slept in Ned's bed at Omega Chi. They had kissed and cuddled together, and his hands had ended up under her clothes a few times, but whenever she told him she wanted to stop, he had pulled back. They had even spent a weekend in this house by themselves at the end of the summer; they had slept in the same bed then, too.

Nancy had never slept in the same bed with anyone else. She had never been as intimate with anyone else as she had been with him. Ned had told her that he had dated a girl his senior year of high school, and they had been intimate with each other, but they hadn't gone all the way. So he was a virgin too, although he had more experience than Nancy had.

The girl in question was named Halley Gilmore. Nancy had met her once, at a party in Mapleton. They had been polite to each other, and Nancy, who generally considered herself a rational, even-tempered person, had wanted to claw the other girl's eyes out.

She knew she had no right to be upset at the other girl, who was pretty and seemed sweet. Knowing there was someone else on earth, though, who had touched the man who was now her fiancé the way _she_ wanted to, who had arched and moved against him...

Sometimes, when Nancy thought about it too much, she was still amazed that Ned hadn't yet tried harder to persuade her to have sex with him. In not too much longer, he would be her husband. And that night he definitely wasn't going to be happy with any more delays...

He wasn't like that. Nancy knew he wasn't. She didn't understand why she felt bad, as though he might find someone like Halley if he wanted to have sex bad enough. Ned wouldn't do that. But in the back of his mind, he knew that was an option, just as she did. Another night like last night, another party, blackout drunk and horny...

Ned walked out of the bathroom before she had even found the lantern. He had towel-dried his dark hair, and he wore a dark-red sweater over a henley and jeans. He had shaved, too. "So do I pass inspection?" he asked with a grin, holding his arms out.

Nancy came over to him and walked into his arms, and he picked her up, holding her tight. God, the scent of his aftershave and shampoo, of _him_ , was so familiar that it made her ache with longing. All too soon he would be at Emerson again, a four-hour drive away from her.

"I'm going to miss you so much," she whispered, without meaning to actually say it.

Ned pulled back, then stroked her cheek. "Hey," he murmured. "Break isn't over quite yet. And it's just one more semester. It'll be over in the blink of an eye." He smiled at her. "And then..."

She smiled back at him. "And then we'll be married," she murmured. "We won't be separated for months at a time anymore."

"I seriously hope not." Ned leaned down and kissed her gently.

When he put her back down, she raised an eyebrow at him. "Okay, you find the lantern while I take a shower," she told him. "And if you didn't leave enough hot water, you're going to have a very sad fiancée in a few minutes."

He stroked her cheek again. "I'll make you a deal," he said. "If the water turns cold, let me know and I'll come warm you up."

"Sure you will." Her heart was beating a little faster.

"Cross my heart."

In the bathroom, Nancy went through her overnight bag. She packed for any eventuality, and she had waterless shampoo, body wash, a basic black dress with flats in case she needed to do some sleuthing at a nicer party, even backup pantyhose. She debated for a moment, then decided. She would take her chances and hope the hot water lasted long enough for her to shampoo and condition her hair. Edith kept the guest bathroom stocked with shampoo, conditioner, soap, and washcloths. Nancy considered taking out a razor and shaving her legs, but she knew the water definitely wouldn't last that long, and her legs were still pretty smooth from shaving the day before.

Then she ran across the small box of condoms in her bag, and bit her lip. When she and Ned had decided they wanted to get married, after the first time they had ever slept in the same bed and he had let her know he wouldn't mind if things went further, she had gone to a drugstore on the highway between River Heights and Emerson and bought them. Her overnight bag was packed for all eventualities, and if she and Ned seriously considered having sex, she wanted to be prepared for that, too. She had even picked up a small bottle of lubricant, too, and had made sure it was compatible with the condoms.

Just as she had told herself when she bought them, Nancy thought it again. Just having the condoms didn't mean they would use them. She felt safer knowing that she had them, and knowing that Ned _didn't_ know.

Nancy took the quickest shower of her life, despairing every time she had to rinse product out of her hair—it seemed to take _so long!_ —and shivering in the chill of the bathroom. She didn't want to crank the heat on the water up so high that it ran out more quickly, but the room was so chilly that her teeth were chattering by the end of her shower. Still, afterward, she no longer felt like her skin was covered in a thin sheen of vodka.

She toweled off and dressed quickly in a clean t-shirt, but put her hoodie, sweater, and jeans back on. After a brisk toweling, her hair was still damp, and hung in reddish waves. She finger-combed it, but knew that without using a hair dryer, it wasn't going to dry straight anyway.

When she walked out, Ned looked up at her with a smile. "I was just about to knock on the door and check on you," he said. "Cold?"

She nodded a few times, coming over to the coffee table. Ned had moved it near the fireplace, and he'd put the lantern in the center of the tabletop, with a stack of board games next to it. Cushions from the couch gave her a place to sit, and she sank onto the one closest to the fireplace so the warmth could help dry her hair. "Here," Ned said, moving next to her, and he pulled her into his lap, slipping his arms around her. "Need to put your hands under my shirt again?"

"Mmm. I think I'll be okay," she murmured, nestling against him with a sigh. "I love the way that cologne smells on you."

Ned chuckled. "That's good, since you gave it to me," he murmured, and stroked his thumb over her cheek. "So we're clean and soon we'll be warm, and in a little while it'll be time for dinner..."

Nancy laughed softly. "Should've known that a can of soup wouldn't fill you up," she murmured. "You know what would be perfect?"

"What?"

"If we could figure out somehow, how to make hot cocoa," she murmured. "I know we don't have real milk, but I think I saw some evaporated milk in the pantry. And we have graham crackers and marshmallows..."

"And chocolate bars?"

"And peanut butter."

"Mmm," Ned murmured happily. "Maybe we should get snowed in together more often, Drew."

When they looked through the games, Ned suggested they play Candy Land, and Nancy laughed but agreed. Ned set up the board and picked the red piece for his, and Nancy picked the blue one. They refreshed themselves on the rules and set up the cards, and Nancy had to laugh at his exuberance. He was rubbing his palms together in anticipation of playing a game Nancy was sure she hadn't played in at least ten years, and for Ned it had probably been even longer.

"What?"

She shook her head. "Just you," she said. "I can imagine you in a few years..."

She trailed off, and Ned tilted his head. "What, in a few years?"

"With kids," she said softly. "With our kids. You're just so patient and sweet, and when I think of you being a dad, it just... it fits."

Ned smiled. "Does that mean you'd like to have kids in a few years, Nan?"

She shrugged. "Maybe. If you would, and if that's when it makes sense for us."

They finished their game of Candy Land, then played Sorry, and then cards. They knew a few games that they could play together, but after they finished their second game of gin rummy, Nancy rose to stretch her legs and ran her fingers through her hair. Her hair was finally dry, and she was finally almost feeling warm enough to take off a layer.

Before the sun went fully down, they brought in enough firewood to last through the night and into the next morning, then went through the pantry. Nancy found a packet of instant mashed potatoes that only called for boiling water, no additional dairy products, so she made those to go with their soup and crackers. Then they toasted marshmallows on skewers, smashing them between graham crackers and chocolate squares.

After their meal, Nancy was full, warm and happy, her fingers sticky with melted chocolate and marshmallow. Ned released a happy sigh as Nancy licked a smear of peanut butter from her hand.

"I've been thinking," Ned said. "I know the beds would be more comfortable, but I'm sure the bedrooms are freezing. What do you say we sleep in here, near the fireplace? At least that way we won't wake up frozen stiff."

"Hmm," Nancy murmured, licking her other fingers. "This couch is a sleeper sofa, right?"

"Yeah. It's not super-comfortable, though."

Nancy shrugged. "I haven't seen a couch-bed yet that was," she admitted. "But we could take the mattress off and put it near the fireplace. So we're not on the floor."

"Good idea."

She smiled. "And yeah, that does sound like a good idea. To sleep in here, near the fire. God, just the sound of the wind..." She shivered.

The wind had died down for a while, when the ice and sleet had stopped falling, but now it had kicked back up again, howling in ominous warning. The back porch was incredibly slippery, and the car's windows were a rippled mass of blue-green ice. Snow swirled when they brought the lantern up to the windows to look out, but it was just snow and sleet being drawn from the ground and the house by the wind. Since the power was out and the cabins near them were unoccupied, the darkness was complete outside the halo of their light, and it was almost eerie. Nancy didn't feel afraid, though. She and Ned were safe together. It felt like they were the only people there for miles around.

They wanted to conserve the fuel for the lantern, so they lit some of the candles Edith kept at the cabin in case of power outages during storms and prepared for bed. Nancy brushed her teeth and changed into a pair of soft, comfortable yoga pants, and when she returned to the living room, Ned had already dragged the mattress off the couch bed and had made it up with a set of sheets. While he brushed his teeth, Nancy found pillows and pillowcases, then made them a nest of several quilts and warm down-filled blankets.

Just before she dove beneath, she pulled her sweater off, leaving her hoodie and t-shirt on, along with her socks. When she was sandwiched between the cold sheets and cold mattress, she was glad she had left so many layers on; she shivered, teeth chattering, and curled up into a small ball, waiting for the bedding to warm up.

Ned came back in wearing a pair of flannel pants with his henley shirt, and when he joined her, he immediately pulled her into his arms. Nancy sighed happily, cuddling up against him. He was always so warm, and on very warm nights that wasn't such a good thing, but tonight she was very glad for the heat he radiated.

"Mmm. You actually feeling sleepy yet, Nan?"

"Just c-cold," she said, her teeth still chattering. "Mmm. You're s-so w-warm."

Ned chuckled when she turned her cold face against his neck. "Glad I could help, babe."

Soon their combined body heat was enough to allow her to relax, and she nestled her head against Ned's shoulder, her arm across his chest. Her breasts were pressed against him, but that didn't feel particularly provocative—at least, not until she thought about it.

They began to talk then about the wedding, Ned's hand stroking over her hair, so softly and regularly that she could almost purr with pleasure. Nancy's father had offered to pay for both the wedding and the honeymoon trip they would take, and they still hadn't decided on their destination. Nancy told Ned quite honestly that she didn't mind where they went, or what they did; they had shared so many adventures in their time together, and she knew they would have more. It would be late spring, though, so Ned suggested they go somewhere further south, even if they stayed in the United States. She liked the idea of Mexico; they could have an economical honeymoon somewhere warm and pretty.

When their conversation trailed off, Nancy sighed, stroking Ned's shoulder. She closed her eyes. "There's something else," she murmured. "Something we haven't talked much about yet."

"Oh?" Ned chuckled. "I thought we'd talked about everything, even down to the attendants' gifts and the money to tip the pastor."

Nancy smiled briefly against him. "The—that night."

"Our wedding night," Ned murmured.

Nancy propped herself up and looked into Ned's eyes. He was still stroking her hair, and when he gazed back at her, she found herself unable to say what was on her mind.

But it was Ned, she reminded herself. He had been her best friend for almost four years.

"Do you—are you sure we're doing the right thing?"

"What do you mean?" he asked softly.

"I mean—do you ever regret asking me to marry you. Have cold feet."

Ned's lips turned up a little. "Other than today, when I had _literally_ cold feet—no. I don't."

"Not even when we argue?"

Ned released a soft sigh, then turned onto his side to face her. He reached for her hand, then laced his fingers through hers. "Not even when we argue," he told her. "We have disagreements; we're going to have disagreements. Marrying you isn't going to change who you are, and the person you are is passionate and stubborn, and caring and thoughtful, and a little bit reckless. Sometimes we're going to see things differently.

"But..." He trailed off, his smile returning for a moment as he looked away.

"What?" Nancy gently squeezed his hand.

"But I've always had a soft spot when it comes to you," he murmured. "To me... God, the words sound so stupid and trite. You're everything to me, sweetheart. I love all of you. I'm completely devoted to you, and I always have been.

"So, no. I don't have cold feet; I'm happier than I've ever been, because you've said you'll spend the rest of your life with me. As long as you feel that way, anything else is incidental. Even if—if the church were flooded and we both had the flu and the pastor had to marry us in the hospital, even if our wedding cake was some cafeteria pudding and our first dance was our hands joined between our hospital beds—I wouldn't care.

"You're my life, Nancy. You and our life together. Putting a name on this is just that, a name."

Nancy's throat felt thick with unshed tears when Ned finished his answer with a soft kiss against her lips. "Oh," she whispered. "You... I love you so much."

"So you feel that way too? Have you—had doubts?"

Nancy shook her head, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "No, no doubts. I do hate arguing with you, but I understand. We'll be ourselves still, just with rings on our fingers and a promise between us."

"A vow," he said with a smile. "A vow I made to you when I put this ring on your finger."

She smiled when he kissed the band of her engagement ring. "You did," she said softly.

"And I meant it. I love you so much, sweetheart."

When he kissed the center of her palm, his lips lingering there, Nancy felt a shiver pass down her belly, tense between her legs. "I love you too," she whispered. "Our wedding... does that mean you don't want it—"

Ned smiled. "No, no, not at all. I want whatever you want. I think our _parents_ are the ones who want a lot of it, but that's okay."

"Yeah," Nancy said. "But, really... I don't know. It just feels like so much; the brunch with our families, the ceremony, the reception. But I feel like it's a way to show everyone who thought I'd never settle down, you know? Show them a big fancy ceremony, the cake, the dress, all of it."

"So it's for them, then?" Ned murmured. "Not for you, or for us?"

She considered. "I guess... not yet."

Ned raised an eyebrow.

Nancy sighed, trying to find the words. "I mean that in a few years, we'll have the pictures and everything to show our kids, and I think that will be good. But at the end of the day, like you said, does it really matter? If we've said the words to each other and meant them, if we have the rings... then it really doesn't matter how it happened, what went wrong or right. Just as long as that did."

Ned tenderly stroked her cheek. "Now, sweetheart... you know I never want to pressure you into anything," he told her. "Whatever would make you happy would make me happy. A huge grand wedding or a tiny one, or even running away tomorrow."

She smiled. "No, they'd never forgive us for doing that," she said. "And I don't feel pressured, not at all. You've always been very sweet and considerate about what I want, and I'm so grateful for that, Ned."

"Because I love you," Ned said softly. "I love you so much, and the last thing I'd ever want in this world is to hurt you."

Nancy reached for Ned's hand and threaded her fingers between his again. "So when we have our big wedding," she said softly, her gaze on his lips before flicking up to his own, "and at the end of the day when we've had too much champagne and we're exhausted from dancing all night, our feet hurt... and we're in our honeymoon suite..."

"Mmm-hmm?" Ned's eyes were glowing a little.

"And if I was too tired to have sex?" She couldn't bring herself to finish the question.

"Well," Ned began slowly.

"Because—it's so much pressure." Nancy's brows drew together a little. "It's our _wedding night_. It's supposed to be this huge perfect thing between us, and we're going to be nervous and excited and... and if I'm not good at it..."

Ned reached up and gently touched his thumb to her lips, and she trailed off. "Honey, I say this with love, okay? You're being silly."

Nancy gasped. "I am _not_ , Ned Nickerson."

"Yeah you are," he said. "It's not in our vows that I'm taking you to love and honor and cherish and to pop your cherry ASAP, unless there's something I don't know. I love you and I cherish you now, and I don't think anyone will be surprised to hear that at the altar. I'm not going to run to your dad and demand a refund if you don't feel like having sex that night. Will I be disappointed? Yeah, I'm sure I will. I've been looking forward to having sex with you for a long time. But it is a lot of pressure, and I can understand how you might be... well, more nervous about it. And my idea of a nice romantic wedding night doesn't involve having sex with you if you don't want to."

"But..." She shook her head.

"But nothing." He smiled. "When have either of us given a damn about what other people _expect_ , anyway?"

She smiled. "Okay."

"Okay." He kissed the tip of her nose.

"So... _no_ is always on the table."

"Mmm-hmm." He kissed her lips gently.

She took a deep breath. "What about yes?"

Ned pulled back and looked into her eyes; his gaze was serious. "What _about_ yes?" he murmured.

She glanced down for a second, then back up at him. "I... You say you've been looking forward to having sex with me. Did you mean once we're married?"

Ned didn't answer immediately. Instead he stroked her cheek, tracing the edge of her lips with his thumb. "I meant when you're ready," he said softly.

"Whether that's after we're married..."

"Or before," he said softly, his voice low and deep. "Yes."

Nancy moved a little closer to him, then touched his face. "Can I ask you to do something for me?"

He nodded. "Of course," he murmured.

"I want to... I want to be with you," she whispered. "Tonight. I want to be closer to you than you were with that other girl. Can we... is that okay? Or is that... would you not want that?"

Ned stroked her cheek again. "I've never been closer to anyone than I am to you," he said softly. "What I feel for you is so unlike what I've felt for anyone else. When I was with—her," he murmured, without saying her name, "it was because I felt very strongly for her, but it's nothing like what I feel for you. You want to be closer, but we already are... and, sweetheart, I'll wait as long as you want. I don't ever want you to regret being intimate with me."

Nancy gave him a small smile. "And I never have," she said softly. "I don't think I ever will. I just... oh, I know it's ridiculous. But I hate knowing that she's been with you in a way I haven't. That she shared something with you that I haven't. I don't know if I'm ready to cross the line, but when I walk down the aisle to you... I just want to be the last woman you've been with, that way."

Ned searched her eyes. "Is it honestly that important to you?" he asked, his tone frank. "I... it sounds like you've been thinking about it. Like you think I compare you to her somehow."

"I do think about it," she admitted. "Every time you want to keep going and I ask you to stop, I always think somewhere at the back of your head you're thinking, 'Well, my _other_ girlfriend wouldn't have wanted to stop...'"

Ned shook his head. "No. I don't think of it that way at all. It just feels so good to be so close to you, and I don't want to stop... but if you're uncomfortable or it doesn't feel good to you, then of course I wouldn't want to keep going. That's all it is, sweetheart. I don't pout and think, 'Damn, I should date some other chick who would put out for me.'"

"Mmm-hmm." Nancy's eyes were sparkling a little.

"What? When I think about making love, when I imagine the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with, that woman is you."

"And when I imagine being with the man who will be my first, my only," she murmured, running her hand through his hair, "it's always been you. I do want you, I do love you; the rest is just words. And this is more."

Ned kissed her, slowly. "It is," he said softly.

He kept kissing her, slow and sweet, and she could hear her heart beating, the occasional crackle and pop of the fire, fabric moving against fabric as they shifted against the sheets. When she opened her eyes, the firelight reflected gold in his dark hair and eyes, and just the sight of him made her heart rise.

Then he pulled her on top of him, catching the zipper at the top of her sweatshirt in his fingers. He inched it down and Nancy moved back a little, giving him space to open it; she shrugged out of it and relaxed against him again, still in her t-shirt and pants. The stretchy material didn't provide much bulk or warmth, though—or much protection. Through the layers between them, beneath Ned's flannel pants, she could feel him tense.

He slipped his hands under her shirt and she shivered, then moved to kiss him again. She released a soft startled noise when she figured out what he was doing; he unfastened the back closure of her bra, which still left it on, but loose.

Then he rolled over with her, on top of her, and Nancy closed her eyes.

She and Ned had slept in the same bed together, had made out, had fooled around a little. She had never seen him naked, and he had never seen her naked. The few times she had come into contact with his erection through his clothes, she had been flustered and nervous, and she had immediately asked him to stop. One of those times, he had excused himself for a minute, and Nancy had been devastated; she had thought he was furious at her. But when he had returned, he had pulled her into his arms and everything had been okay again. Bess had gleefully explained when Nancy had told her about it, and her explanation had left Nancy feeling a little better, but a little horrified, too.

It wasn't that she hadn't wanted it. It was that she had wanted it too much.

And it was a thousand other things, too. Worry that she wouldn't be a good girl if she let him cross the line with her; worry that, even though he said he wanted to be with her, that it was a test and giving in meant failing. Worry that having sex with him was the wrong choice; worry that she wasn't ready. And she hadn't felt ready. She hadn't felt ready until after he had asked her to marry him that summer, and she had said yes.

Not until tonight. And even tonight, she wasn't sure. She wanted to feel him close to her; she wanted him to be happy with her, and she wanted to know what physical pleasure they could share even if they didn't have sex. A part of her was still convinced, though, that if he took off her clothes, if he was naked too, the next step would be very quick, very easy to make.

It would be done. She wouldn't be the lesser for it, she didn't think—but their relationship would be different...

And did it matter so much? Now or five months from now, next week or a year from now, on a mattress before the fireplace in his parents' cabin or a large bed in a bridal suite at a Mexican resort? She wouldn't love him less. Her outfit wasn't seductive or even sexy tonight, but the candlelight was soft and lovely, and they were cozy and safe together, out of the storm.

Nancy opened her eyes lazily and looked up at him. He was kneeling between her partially open thighs, but he didn't have his hips pressed to hers. She had been so skittish with him before; no wonder he was being cautious.

And his dark eyes were glowing and soft, and when she cupped his cheek he smiled at her. "I love you," she whispered.

"And I love you," he murmured. "You're so beautiful, sweetheart."

"And you feel so good," she whispered. "I like being with you like this."

He leaned down and kissed her again, and she paused for a second before she slipped her hands under his top. She began to inch it up, her lips parting beneath his, and they only broke the kiss so she could pull his shirt off.

She pulled the blanket up over him so he wouldn't get cold, but oh, his skin was so warm under her palms as she stroked his back. He kissed her again and she trailed her fingertips up his spine, then her fingernails, very lightly, as she ran them back down. When she reached the small of his back, Ned made a soft noise against their kiss, then nuzzled against her.

"Can I," he whispered, and then he moved between her thighs, and she felt his erection press against her through their pajamas. She flinched a little and he pulled back to look into her face.

"No?"

"Sorry, I was just—it's okay."

He smiled briefly, but his gaze was still concerned. "Are you sure?"

She nodded. "It's okay. I just... let's just take it slow, okay?"

He nodded, then leaned down to her again, kissing her softly. "Slow," he whispered, and tilted toward his side so he could touch the hem of her shirt.

Nancy shivered, willing her heart to slow, but he did keep his word. He cupped her waist under her shirt and she ran her fingers through his hair, returning his kiss sweetly. Oh, she loved kissing him. She loved when he stroked his tongue against hers, when she was left almost reeling, shivering with delight.

Then he kissed her neck and inched his hand up a little.

No one would interrupt them; no one could. No one else was there.

Nancy let herself stop worrying. She didn't worry about what anyone would say or think; she just concentrated on how good it felt when he touched her, when his bare chest just brushed against hers. He paused when his hand reached the band of her bra, and after a moment Nancy kissed his chin and raised her arms.

He smiled as he began to slip her shirt up, and once it was off, he pulled the covers back over them again, until they were almost fully covered, cocooned in the warmth from their bodies. She wrapped her arms around him, the flesh between her thighs tightening for a second when the fabric of her bra rubbed against the sensitive tips of her breasts.

Ned kissed her again, slowly. His hips were against hers, and her legs were parted only wide enough for his knees to fit between hers, her own knees unbent. When he kissed her earlobe Nancy shivered against him, holding him.

Then he broke the kiss again, and she sighed. "I love kissing you," she murmured.

He smiled. "I love kissing you too, Nan. Do you mind if I..."

He reached up, looking into her eyes as he caught the strap of her bra between his fingers. She swallowed. "I don't mind," she whispered.

Together they pulled her bra off, and Nancy could feel her pulse beating hard in her throat when they put it with the rest of her clothes. Then Ned moved onto his side, propping his head up so he could look down into her face.

The tip of Nancy's nose felt a little cold, but she gave him a small nervous smile. "You okay?"

He nodded. "It's just nice," he murmured. "Not having to worry about anyone coming in and seeing us like this. Guess that's how it'll be once we're married, huh?"

"I'd think so," Nancy agreed. "I mean, unless we're staying over at your parents' house for the night, for some reason."

Ned smiled and touched her belly, and Nancy flinched slightly again, but her eyes were steady on his. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm just jumpy... it's not that I don't like it."

"I understand," he murmured, and traced a very slow circle around her belly button, in a wide loop. "Every time you were ever over at my house, I always imagined taking you up to my room. Dreamed about it a few times, too, in fact."

Though she was acutely aware of how uncovered she was, his slow, gentle touch was helping relax her. "That's sweet."

His smile became a small smirk. "It—well, what I imagined doing with you wasn't exactly sweet."

Before she could talk herself out of it, she took a breath and met his eyes. "When you—were with her, was it there?"

Ned shook his head. "It was at her parents' house," he said softly. "Her brother interrupted us. Anything else you want to know?"

Nancy blushed, but she kept going. "Did you—see her like this? Touch her?"

Ned shook his head again. "Under her clothes, so I didn't see her. But I did touch her chest, and... It—it was kind of a blur; we knew someone could come home, and so we were all over each other fast..."

Nancy released a soft sigh and drew his hand up, guiding his palm to her breast. He cupped her, his touch gentle, and his lashes fluttered down for a moment.

"I meant what I said, Nan," he murmured. "Sometimes... sometimes it's so desperate because you know it won't last, and I just wanted to have it all before it crashed back down again... and sometimes, with you, that was all I thought we would have." Then he opened his eyes again. "But you said yes. And I can show you all the love I thought I would have to hold back..."

He was slowly fondling her nipple with the ball of his thumb, and Nancy sighed in pleasure. She wanted him to see her; she wanted him to look at her and to see desire and delight in his eyes in return.

"When I'm with you," Nancy murmured, "all of me feels centered on you. Even when I'm not looking at you, a part of me—almost feels like it is. God help me, but I'd love you no matter what. I feel helplessly in love with you, Ned. I'd walk into fire with you beside me. I'd take on anything and anyone with you beside me. And when we're married—I just don't want it to change; I don't want that feeling to end."

"You think it will?"

"I hope it doesn't." She let out a soft pleased gasp as he began to slowly fondle her other breast. The flesh between her thighs felt tense. "I don't want to lose this. I don't want us to turn into one of those couples who stays together because they don't know what else to do, the ones who decide six months in that it was a mistake. That would break my heart."

"I honestly don't believe we'll lose this," he told her. "You know why?"

She shook her head. The feel of his palm against her bare breast was incredible, but her gaze and attention were locked to his words.

"Because you're my best friend," he told her. "Because we aren't walking into this blind; because we've learned how to disagree without it breaking us. Because we've lost each other before, and we know how much it hurts, and we know how much is at stake. You're not _just_ my girlfriend, sweetheart. You're my fiancée, the love of my life, the person who knows me better than anyone else. I wouldn't have asked you to marry me if I didn't think we could be partners in this. And I hope you wouldn't have said yes unless you felt the same way."

She smiled at him. "You're the love of my life too," she whispered. "And one of the scariest things about realizing that you're the other part of me was acknowledging that without you, I don't feel like a whole person anymore. Being with you makes me feel so much stronger than being alone... oh, Ned, that feels so good..."

His smile widened a little. "You like that?"

She nodded. "Do you... do you want to look at me?"

"Very much," he said softly. "But it's too cold, isn't it?"

She smiled. "Let's find out," she suggested.

Ned moved back, gently pulling back the covers, and she contracted a little when a wave of cooler air washed over her. It wasn't terrible, though; they were still near the halo of heat from the fireplace.

The firelight danced in his eyes when he gazed at her face again. "You're so beautiful."

She smiled. "So are you," she told him, and when he let the blanket fall back over them, she rolled onto her side to face him. She caressed his chest, feeling the muscles there tense and relax under her touch. "Surely this doesn't make you feel nervous too."

He chuckled softly. "Of course it does," he said softly. "I get self-conscious too, Nan."

"About what? Ned, you're so handsome. Muscular and well-built, and strong... and those eyes; just looking into your eyes sends a shiver down my spine. I love everything about you. You just... you just have this glow about you, and I get so nervous when other people are around because I know they have to see it too."

He smiled at her. "I feel the same way about you," he told her gently, and ducked in to kiss her again.

She laughed with delight when he rolled onto his back and pulled her on top of him; she was becoming more accustomed to being so close to him, and the feel of his bare chest against her nipples and breasts was delicious. He caressed her back, down to the lowest part of her spine, then down against her ass, through her pants. She hesitated in their kiss, but she didn't pull back, not until he reached for her knee and bent it so she was partially straddling him.

"Ned?" she whispered.

"Not okay?"

"It's..." She trailed off. Then she looked into his eyes, her brow furrowing. "It feels good," she whispered. "And a little scary."

"Scary?"

She nodded, then leaned down to kiss him again.

Ned kept an arm looped around her waist, bringing his other hand up to fondle and gently squeeze her breast. Nancy sank her teeth into his lower lip, nipping gently at him, and when he squeezed her nipple between forefinger and thumb, applying only light pressure, she blushed as her hips bucked a little.

"Mmm," Ned groaned softly, breaking their kiss. "Oh, Nan..."

She felt an excited tension low in her belly, a soft awareness pulsing in her head and between her thighs. She closed her eyes as she bent her other knee, fully straddling him; she felt him breathe out, warm against her cheek. It felt good; it felt right.

"Is this okay?" she whispered.

He ran his fingers through her hair. "For now it is," he murmured, his other hand rubbing against her ass, still over her clothes.

"For now?"

"Mmm. Do you want to..."

She opened her eyes as he gently pushed down, so that her hips were pressed against his, the join of her thighs pressed against the firm length of his erection. A hard shudder went down her spine, her lips parting softly. She wanted to move, but she was afraid to.

"Does it hurt?" she whispered.

"Does what hurt?"

"Being... the way you are right now," she said, too shy to be any more specific about it.

"To be aroused? Not yet." He smiled at her, a little nervously. "Is it all right? It just feels really good, the way you're touching me... and if you want to move a little..."

She parted her knees a little more, blushing as she gently brushed her hips against his, and he stroked her back as his other hand rested against her ass. She could _feel_ everything; she could feel so clearly the warmth of his skin, the rise and fall of his chest, almost every individual hair as his fingertips brushed against it. She hung her head as she did it again, releasing her breath in a soft sigh as she rubbed herself against him.

It did feel very nice to do it. She hadn't expected that.

Then Ned grasped her hip, groaning softly, and she cringed when he swung her off him. She had done something wrong, she just knew it. He was upset with her.

Or they had gone farther than they should have—and he would need to do what Bess had said, to _take care of it._

"Can I touch you, Nan?" He was panting a little.

"Haven't we been?" she asked, a little confused.

"Yeah, but... like this..."

Nancy choked a little when Ned slipped his hand beneath the band of her yoga pants, into her underwear. She froze, unsure of how to react, what she should do, what he wanted...

"Shit," Ned breathed. "I'm making you uncomfortable."

"No," she murmured. "It's just... I don't know what to do. I'm sorry."

"Just open your legs," he said softly. "If that's okay."

She did, and as soon as he cupped the flesh between her thighs, she tensed. "It's—it's okay," she whispered, when he paused again. "I... oh..."

He smiled. "Good?"

She nodded, then whimpered quietly when he traced his fingertip up the slit between her thighs. "Should I, do you want me—to touch you too?"

In answer Ned shifted his weight, then nodded; when she reached for him, she realized that he had pushed his pants and underwear down for her. Her tentative fingers encountered the hot firm length of his erection, and she gently clasped him.

"Okay," Ned sighed. "Much more of that, and we'll have to stop... and now, sweetheart, this is farther than I've ever been before."

A prickling flush spread over her chest. "Really?"

"Mmm-hmm."

"So..." She felt a little foolish, but she kept going. "What do we do?"

"I think we should do what feels good," he told her. "We can stop if we want to... or we can keep going, if we want."

"Okay," she whispered. "But we'll have to stop, you said?"

He gave her a small smile. "You asked if this hurts," he said. "It doesn't—hurt, but... I'll take care of it, when it gets to be too much."

He was still gently stroking her between her legs. "Is that part of... sex?"

He chuckled. "You know how you were asking how I could be self-conscious? Well, since I've never been with anyone like this before, I've never... well, usually at this point, if I'm this aroused, I'd jack off. I don't know what it would be like to... well, to go further. And I'm so fucking turned on right now that if my dick touched just your inner _thigh_ , I think I'd lose it."

"Lose it?" She felt very naive, to have to ask him so much, but she wanted to understand.

"Come," he said. "Ejaculate."

Nancy nodded. "You mean even if you weren't—inside me."

He nodded, too. "I mean, I _want_ to be this really self-assured guy who could hold out for hours, but let's just say that I don't have much practice with endurance in this situation, not yet."

"Well, neither do I," she told him with a smile. "I guess that's something else we would be learning." She gently brushed her thumb against the tip of his dick, and he shuddered.

"Or I'll _really_ be a total dork and come in your hand, if you keep doing that."

Nancy released him immediately, and he chuckled. "Did I mention how good it felt when you were doing that?"

She shook her head. "Did you not want me to stop?"

"I don't know what I want," Ned admitted. "Well, that's a lie. You can say no, but can I take your pants off?"

"Did you want to—do that? To touch me with... it, and... come?"

He paused and searched her eyes. "Do you... Would you be okay with that?"

"I don't know," she said frankly. "But it's okay with me if we try... if it's not really sex."

"I wouldn't be inside you, if that's what you mean." His eyes were so bright when she took a deep breath and slipped out of her pants and her panties, before she could change her mind.

"Are you going to be disappointed, if we do that?"

"I don't understand," she said softly. "I've never... it feels good to be with you like this, and if you want to do that, then I want to, too."

Ned took a deep breath and moved, and she heard cloth against cloth. She was on her back, her legs parted slightly, and then he slowly moved over her, his knee slipping between hers. He felt warmer. She was pretty sure he was naked, and she was too.

Then he pressed his lips together. "There's... there's this way I've heard of," he said softly. "Where you'd press your thighs together and I'd move between and that way I wouldn't be—inside you. But I don't know... it would be messy, and..."

Nancy's heart was beating so hard. "Messy?"

"Yeah. Maybe we should put a towel under us... I guess it's too much trouble."

"No, it's okay. If you want to do that—let me go grab a towel."

"No, seriously, sweetheart. I can do it. It's freezing, and—"

Nancy shook her head, grabbing a quilt and wrapping it around her. She was shivering, and not all from the cold. "Let me just grab something else too, really quickly. I'll be right back."

She took a candle and went to the bathroom to grab a towel, and she didn't think twice before she grabbed the condoms and the lube too, folding them into the towel so she could carry it all back. If they were going to be naked together, she wanted to be ready, just in case.

Ned was sitting up on the mattress when she returned, watching for her, and Nancy handed him the towel, then carefully put down the candle and dropped the quilt before sliding back under the sheets with him. She knew that if he had caught a glimpse of her, it was brief, but it still gave her a little thrill.

Ned made a soft noise of surprise as the lube and condoms fell out of the towel. "You...?"

She blushed again. "I wanted to be ready," she said.

"Well..." He smiled. "Wow."

"Too much?"

He shook his head. "No, it's good. I just didn't expect it. You had seemed really shy about going too far."

Nancy slid her arm under her head to pillow it. Her heart was beating faster again. "Well, just because we have that stuff doesn't mean we're going to use it," she pointed out. "Right?"

"Right," he agreed, and settled back onto the mattress with her. "But having it here kind of makes me think that you maybe want to, though?"

Nancy shrugged, then smiled. "Just because I carry band-aids around doesn't mean I want to get scraped up," she said, her voice a little teasing. When he tickled her in response, she laughed and squirmed, a part of her filled with wonder at the knowledge that they were actually having fun, that it wasn't all serious and frightening and painful.

Then she hooked her legs around him and rolled him onto his back, grabbing his hands and pinning them over his head; he let her, and she knew that he was letting her, but then she realized that she was naked and on top of him, and he was definitely enjoying it.

"Besides," she said, still panting for breath, and his eyes were bright as she looked into them, "if we're naked and... playing around, I just... if we decided we wanted to, we could."

Ned smiled. "I didn't mean to make you self-conscious about it. It's... nice. I mean, I carry a few condoms in my wallet..."

Nancy raised her eyebrows, deliberately lowering herself so her front was pressed against his. "Mmm-hmm? _Now_ who's the one playing better safe than sorry?"

He shrugged. "Band-aid," he repeated, a twinkle in his eye.

Then, with a swift jolt of his hips, he reversed their positions and had her pinned down on the mattress, her legs parted and his hips between her thighs. Nancy gasped in surprise, staring up into his eyes. "Now, sweetheart," he said softly, "we are definitely far beyond where I have ever been before. What we were talking about before... we don't have to do that, unless you want to."

"But you want to?"

"I... yeah," he murmured. He released her, and she slipped her arms around his shoulders. "If that's okay."

Together they took the towel and spread it on the sheet, and then Nancy moved so it was directly under her hips and upper thighs. She wasn't sure what he was going to do, but since he had said it wouldn't be sex, she was happy to find out. The feel of his skin against hers was so incredibly delicious, and he took the lube she had brought and poured some into his palm.

"Put your legs together," he murmured, and Nancy did, gazing up at him curiously. Then he straddled her, and Nancy shivered, a warm tingling spreading through her stomach and over the join of her thighs.

Then he pursed his lips, considering for a second. Finally he shook his head.

"What?"

"I... this would probably work better if you were on your knees," he murmured. "But let's just try it."

Nancy quirked her lips. "I'd rather be facing you," she murmured. "If that's okay."

"Of course it is," he told her. "And I'd rather be able to see your face too. Now..."

He reached down and she heard something wet. His lips parted, his lashes drifting down, and Nancy blushed as she realized he was probably stroking the lube over himself. Then he wiped his palm on the towel and lowered himself to her.

She jumped when she felt him, hot and hard and slick, just between her upper thighs. She whimpered a little, without meaning to, as he lowered himself to her.

"It's okay," he murmured. "Is it okay? _Fuck_..."

"Yeah," she murmured, putting her arms around him. "Does it feel good?"

"Mmm. _Shit_ ," he whispered. "Nan..."

She tipped her head back and he kissed her, and she shivered as she felt his erection move between her thighs. He wasn't inside her, he was just rubbing against the press of her thighs, but he thrust his hips and Nancy shuddered. "Oh..."

"Mmm?" His voice sounded strained.

"Do I need to do anything?"

Ned shook his head, then kissed her hard again. When the tip of his cock brushed low against the join of her thighs, she groaned, running her hand through his hair. "Ned?" she gasped out.

"Fuck," he groaned. "Hmm?"

"I want to open my legs," she panted. She felt so hot, too hot. "Is that bad?"

"I don't know," Ned panted. "Shit, okay."

She opened her legs and wrapped them around him, and Ned adjusted himself, and Nancy let out a soft squeal when she felt his erection rubbing directly against her. "No?"

"It's—it's not sex, right?" His hips were moving gently, and the friction and heat was nice.

"No, I don't... I'm not inside you... holy _shit._ "

"What?"

"God, it's so good," he murmured. Nancy was blushing but she smiled, kissing him again as she felt him rub against her. She had never experienced anything like it, and although she was still nervous that it would be too easy to go much farther very quickly without her even realizing it, it really did feel good. Knowing that he liked it too was even better, and his chest brushed against hers as he rubbed against her again.

Then he shifted the angle of his hips, and she felt the head of his sex rub between her legs, and she shivered even though it scared her a little. "Oh, _oh!_ " she gasped out.

"Too hard?" Ned was panting.

"No, again," she cried. "Please."

She laced her fingers through his hair as he did it again, and her body tensed and relaxed under his, along with his thrust. "Oh," she whispered, arching. " _Mmmm_."

"Mmm-hmm," Ned agreed. "Am I rubbing against your clit or something, babe?"

"I don't know," she panted. "I think so?"

He did it again, arching over her, and then began to move against her in firm regular thrusts. Nancy trembled and whimpered, tilting her head back and panting at how good it felt. Ned was gritting his teeth, and then he let out a stuttering groan, going stiff over her.

Nancy tipped her head back down, gazing up at him curiously. Ned's eyes were closed, and he looked—she had never seen him look like that before. Then he released a long sigh and moved back, looking down at her; he moved the tail of the towel up and wiped her lower belly.

"Mmm," he groaned. "Wow, Nan..."

She gave him a small smile. "That was good?"

He nodded. "Very good, baby. Wow. God, you feel so good..."

"I do?"

"Mmm-hmm." He moved onto his side and she cuddled up to him. Between her legs felt uncomfortably slick, cool against her skin; she felt almost a little like she was choking, still anxious and anticipating.

"Ned?"

"Hmm?" He had his arm draped over her, and he was idly stroking her back.

"Can we do that again?"

He chuckled softly. "Sure, sweetheart."

"Like... now?"

He moved to look into her eyes and touched her cheek. "Still feeling horny, huh?"

She blushed. "I..."

He smiled. "It's okay. Here, let's try this, okay? You can be on top..."

He moved onto his back, then guided her so she was straddling him. "Here. Would it work for you if you rubbed against my thigh? Kind of like I was doing with you?"

Nancy raked her hair back from her flushed face. "Maybe," she murmured, then lowered the join of her thighs to him. " _Mmmm_..."

"So yes," he murmured, a smile in his voice. Nancy couldn't believe how good it felt to rub against him, and even though it didn't feel very dignified, Ned wasn't objecting to feeling her rock her hips against him. He even reached up and cupped her breasts, fondling her nipples, and Nancy hissed at the intense sensation.

"Good?"

"Mmm," she groaned, nodding, rubbing against him more urgently. "Mmm, _yes_."

She kept going until she was biting her lip to stifle her cries, her hips jerking. "Hey," Ned murmured. "If you want to be loud, that's okay, honey. We're all alone."

She released a low deep groan then, forcing her eyes open. "Oh my God you feel _so good,_ " she moaned.

He gave her a brief smile, still fondling her nipples. "Nan?"

"Hmm?"

"Here," he murmured. "Do you want me to touch you? Inside?"

The friction she could feel against the top of her sex was disappointingly soft, but enough to tease her to a higher wave of arousal. "How?" she panted. "Like we were...?"

"No, with my fingers."

She nodded, and Ned trailed his fingers down to between her legs; Nancy's hips were still rocking, but she pushed herself up on her knees to give him space. Ned traced her curiously, watching her face, and it was driving her absolutely crazy, to feel his fingers against her sensitive inner flesh.

When his fingers brushed her in that particular place, she cried out and sank to him again, pressing herself against his hand, kissing him hard. He chuckled and kept touching her, and she was panting, nuzzling against his neck, nipping at him.

"Mmm. You like that, huh," he murmured.

"Mmm-hmm," she groaned, drawing her knees up to give herself more leverage. Ned stroked and caressed her, moving his other hand down too, and she sobbed in pleasure.

"Nan," he murmured. "Oh God, baby. You like this? Down... here, like this?"

She shuddered, crying out as he moved low between her legs. His fingers were stroking and probing still, and then he curved one up between her thighs. "Oh my _God,_ " she panted breathlessly. "Oh, _oh!_ "

"Yes?"

"Yes," she sobbed. "Yes _oh God ohhhh..._ "

Ned groaned. "Shit, Nan. It's a good thing we have condoms."

Nancy's eyes flew open. "Why?" she panted. "Oh my _God..._ "

"You feel so good," he groaned. "Oh _shit_. So hot and wet and tight... Mmm."

She arched over him, her hips jerking as she rode his fingers. A small part of her was concerned, about everything—about how she looked and sounded, whether he was turned off or on by it, if she was doing it right, if this was somehow going to end with them having sex, if it _was_ sex—but it felt incredible, and she felt desperate and ecstatic and flushed and delighted and coiled tight, all at once. If it had been like this for him, when he had been moving against her—God.

If he was inside her, if his erection was inside her the way his fingers were now—

She sobbed, almost choking, trembling as her hips rocked frantically against his fingers, and she tossed her head back, letting out a high shrill scream as he rubbed hard against that sensitive part of her with his other thumb. God, every brush of his fingers made her even more aroused, and Ned was panting too.

"Baby, you are so fucking hot," he growled. "Oh, sweetheart, it is so _hot_ to watch you getting off on this."

"It feels so good," she panted. "Oh my _God_..."

She moved again, her inner thigh brushing against his dick, as she kissed him hard. He had two fingers inside her and his other thumb was rubbing against her clit; when he stopped, she jerked against him. He got the message and, chuckling, began to stroke her again.

"Ned," she sobbed, jerking against him again, every muscle tensing as her arousal became unbearably intense. They kissed hard and there wasn't enough air, there wasn't, oh _God..._

"Nancy," he panted. "Mmm, sweetheart..."

She groaned, thrusting her hips, and then cried out again. "Yes yes _yes oh God yes don't stop_..."

When the pressure inside her peaked she cried out, going still, and Ned groaned loudly. "Shit. Nan," he panted, and when he stroked her clit again she spasmed against him, crying out more loudly. She was moaning, her hips rocking gently, and when he slipped his fingers out of her she pressed a kiss against his neck.

Then he looped his arms around her, and she panted, slumped boneless against him. She felt both exhilarated and exhausted, somehow, at the same time.

Ned dropped a kiss against the crown of her head. "Okay, it is really good that that didn't happen at the same time," he murmured.

"Hmm?"

His arms tightened around her. "That we weren't both getting off at the same time," he said.

Nancy nestled against him. "Mmm," she murmured, her eyes still closed. He was naked and warm against her and she just felt so completely relaxed and satisfied that she just wanted to sleep.

Ned chuckled softly and kissed her again, and she heard him wipe his hands on the towel. She blushed. "Sorry," she murmured.

"About what?"

"I... it was all slippery and..."

"And that's good," he murmured. Together they rolled onto their sides, still pressed against each other; she reached for the tail of the towel and swiped between her thighs, too. "Is that what you wanted?"

It took her a few seconds to realize what he meant. "Yeah," she admitted softly. "That felt so good. Oh _God_ , so good."

"You might have mentioned that," Ned murmured, a smile in his voice. "I'm glad, honey. It was good for me too."

The euphoria lingered for several minutes, but once it passed Nancy was shivering with the cold again. They reached for their underwear and shirts, and Nancy cuddled against him bare-legged when they were dressed again, her bra still on the floor.

"Ned?" she whispered, her voice slow and soft. She felt almost delirious, happy and drowsy.

"Mmm-hmm?" he murmured, just as quietly.

"Thanks," she whispered. "For doing that with me."

"It's all right, sweetheart," he murmured, and kissed her forehead. "I've been wanting that for a long time..."

She sighed and rested her head against his chest. His knee was between her thighs, and she felt so safe and warm. "I love you," she breathed.

"And I love you," he murmured.


End file.
